BUDGETING CORRUPTION.......!!!!

The Budget Session is due and the officials in the Finance Ministry are busy putting together numbers that could get the Finance Minister lot of  applause on the floor of the house and more importantly, votes for the ruling party in the General Elections to be held next year. The pundits, on  the other hand, are eagerly waiting for that invite to a prime time budget discussion in a swanky studio of a Business News Channel or for that matter, to ink a guest column for The Economic Times. Their Budget Special is awesome and to feature in that is like an extra credit to the CV. Senior Citizens in Kolkata are already discussing the "good for nothing" policies of the government....."jaanen moshai, Chidomborom aar Monmohon Shing kono kaajer na.... HOPELESS EKDOM HOPELESS!!!". Classroom discussions hotting up in the galaxy of Management Institiutes, Dalal Street Executives getting nervous and the Aam aadmi, well we are insulated from any damn shock....isn't it???? We have learnt to live with any shit that is thrown at us either by life or at an alarmingly consistent rate,by our political class(read crass) of course. Budget comes and goes every year. There is a bit of OOHs & AAHs but all that is forgotten the very next morning as if God does an update of our systems at night, while we are asleep, in order for us to be able to accept the changes. Infact, Aam Aadmi is God's best invention in this volatile environment. And its IRONICAL to say the least.

We have learnt to live with politics on religion, politics through reservations, politics of corruption and the disgusting state of politics itself. Nothing bothers us anymore in the long run. There is a widespread acceptance of the fact that the corrupt system is incorrigible and corruption is like an enemy that you have to sleep with. There is no point in losing one's sleep by trying to stare at its eyes. Turn your back towards it and hope that you are not it's prey. Our politicians and other corrupt forces are looting the nation and are able to go scot free. Aam Aadmi's digestive system is very good. "Hazam karne waale hum hain......khaane waale koi aur hain". 

There are times when an oasis is spotted in this desert bereft of morals but the discovery of a mirage leaves the thirsty society disappointed instead. Take the last couple of years for instance, it seems as if there is an IPL of CORRUPTION going on with one team trying to outclass the others. The scores have been ridiculously high and yet they get bettered each time some new incident comes to light. Mr.Anna Hazare seemed to strike a chord with Aam Aadmi momentarily and most of us jumped like monkeys at the thought that its CLEAN UP TIME. Most of the remaining population were motivated to login and post some words on Facebook or Twitter while some of us(including me) were circumspect about the whole thing. It seemed too good to be true or sustainable. Unfortunately, we were right and this "Safed Topi" activism got hijacked by the ambitions of the core group of people involved with the cause. Out of this episode, emerged a political party, led by Mr.Arvind Kejriwal, with a single objective of naming and shaming people. Mr.Anna Hazare seems to have withdrawn from all this for the time being while Mrs.Kiran Bedi is hopping from one studio to another.

The idea behind this post is an outrageous one but nevertheless, it appears to be a reasonable one to me at least, for this concept is entirely mine....lol. Looking ahead, this sarcastic person within me can foresee a Budget Session in the coming years where that Budget Paper would carry "Provisioning for the losses on account of corruption". The monetary resources of our nation is not a happy picture for our economy going by the huge fiscal deficit that has been one of the two problem children, the other being inflation of course. We follow a deficit budgeting system and Grand Canyon between expenditure and revenues is funded mostly through debt. Foreign exchange reserves have not increased enough with imports far outweighing exports. On the debt side, the reserves will get further stretched once the foreign currency repayments get voluminous. Self-sufficiency is a dream that has still remained a dream. 

Now, let me introduce the "corruption" factor into the mix and the picture gets real gloomy. India is strong in natural resources which have huge tangible worth. We have not been able to make use of those resources to the fullest and instead what we are seeing is that these are gradually getting drained or looted with every passing day. Loss of such valuable resource is bound to have an impact on the economy's Balance Sheet and hence I am advocating that such loss has to be accounted for. Time has come when our representatives need to be appraised in terms of their performance. Only with accountability norms in place would these people wake up and do what they were meant to do. When I talk about provisioning for loss due to corruption, I am being objective as corruption is bound to happen. If we cannot stop the criminals, we can at least force the "people in power" to crack the whip, if not by intent than at least in fear of being thrown out by the electorate. The provisioning would be divided into various sectors and at the end of the year, the concerned minister would be judged in terms of provisioned amount vis-a-vis actuals. I guess with tools like RTI and people like Arvind Kejriwal, percentages would be high. In fact, morals or ethics based scores should be 

encouraged in every appraisal system, why restrict it to politicians alone!!!!

Honesty is one inconsistent virtue. Even the brutally honest person at times resorts to some form of corruption or other. It is all about curbing human instincts. We ourselves are not clean and hence we tend to accept the corruption in others and of much larger scale. Ethical cleansing has to be injected into the social framework by force till the Aam Aadmi learns to live with it. God will be running the updates even then and hence I am sure that WE WILL ACCEPT THE POSITIVE CHANGES AS WELL!!!!

LEFT GASsing.....!!!

For 28 odd years, this heavy red object was just another thing in the kitchen. It was not so important and I,for sure, had very little to do with it except on occasions when it required to be moved in or out of the house. In fact, that part of the house which we call "Kitchen" never appealed to me. Some people enjoy the process and some enjoy the output. I belong to the latter group and love my food but to imagine myself fighting with the masalas and the utensils, would be torturous in itself.

But things change and the priorities as well. I got married and......oh wait, don't think,even for a moment, that I have started cooking. I care for my wife and no insurance covers death due to "damage to taste buds". Long live..........Missus Goswami. Well, I may actually become Sanjeev Kapoor of my kitchen someday but that day is ages away. As for now, I have realised the importance of a Cylinder in one's life especially when you pass on the induction cooker to your mother-in-law after having failed to get it working. Moreover, Kerosene is hard to find these days and that wonderful warm "mud chulha" is a thing of the past.

It was not enough to only understand the importance of having a Gas Connection in one's name but I actually had to draw out a plan for acquisition of one such connection to keep the poor fish vendors of Sector 47 in business. So, for the noble cause of Social Upliftment, I got down to work without any delay. The first step was obvious and that was to get the documents ready. But my allegiance lies with the Internet and beliefs with anything that requires very little ink. My friend, Vikas would recollect the long drawn battle that I had with Airtel DTH before they took note of my online registration and installed that dish which coincidentally was again "red" in colour. Ignoring that incident of service deficiency as an odd aberration, I registered online with HP Gas. A sixteen digit reference number seemed impressive and since then I had been waiting for a call where a friendly voice would say "Sir thank you for choosing HP Gas and we are at your doorstep with a gorgeous red cylinder, waiting for you to let us into your kitchen".  HP Gas is marketed as "Your friendly Gas" and I guess that is why they have taken my registration as a friendly banter and laughed it away.

Not getting any response irked me, but New Year's Day was a good occasion to forgive and forget. The day began with me not being able to make any headway even after being just tenth in queue for AADHAR registration. After braving the tough winter chill, I still managed enough composure to walk in to the nearest Gas Agency (M/s Sabharwal Gas Agency) with the documents for registration. The moment I mentioned about the online registration, I got a quick reply crushing all my hopes of the reference number being acknowledged. My pressing need for a connection helped me ride that wave as well and I forwarded my papers for an offline registration. The documents got accepted without the KYC and I was told that KYC would be required afterwards. It sounded absurd but then I was happy as my documents were accepted. Before I could overcook my celebration, it was burnt in that very stove which was being sold to me forcefully. My refusal was initially met with indifference and then the Agency Manager looked at me as if to say "Boy...you have walked into the Lion's Den and you would live on my terms here". I tried to teach him that "paath" of rules and "customer is the king" funda. He didn't care though and told me that I had no option but to fall in line. I almost did and withdrew six grands strangely without any hassles from the ATM downstairs which usually remains defunct most of the times. I started climbing the stairs and one gaze at the crisp currency notes made my heart sink with the thought that I was about to seriously compromise my pending vacation. My first day of the new year ended with two more reference numbers, one for AADHAR and another for "Forced sale of stove/hotplate" with HP Gas.

For seven days, I kept waiting for a reply and moreover, the Customer Service number was perhaps a ghost number. Its 8th of January, 2013 and my request was finally closed. HP Gas, however,has managed to keep me guessing with their "Copy Paste Grievance Redressal System". Their reply was "By rule, no agency can forcefully sell the stove if the consumer already possesses an ISI approved one at home". As if I didn't know. I am alarmed at their Einstein-ism and amazingly, their complaint site, by default, has the issue of forced sale of stove as the first option in the dropdown. This seems to be the most common complaint and yet HP Gas is happy giving a free hand to its agencies. Lack of intent to act is as good profiteering. As for me, there are ofcourse other options but not holding a AADHAR card has almost changed my citizenship to a void one. And for that stupid number, I need to go back to the queue and hope that someday it will move. By the time, I am able to get out of this vicious circle, I guess my wife would have grown comfortable with  the smoke from the "mud chulha" and I would have grown comfortable with the long queues outside coal shops. Tomorrow would be another attempt of mine to avoid all such circumstances and make our future full of energy as HPCL claims on its portal. 

And yeah, as I wait to welcome a beautiful red Cylinder of my own into the kitchen, I have already spent three grands out of those six grands on food and movies...lol!!!

Cherrapunji......a Treasure in need of being treasured!!!!

A THING OF BEAUTY IS A JOY FOR EVER....

You must have heard this so many times since you were introduced to the wonderful world of literature early in your life. But, now I know that this feeling of joy fades away with the fading beauty. On a recent trip to my hometown, it was painfully embarrassing for me to look at the eyes of this tourist wondering if all those great things she had heard from her husband were actually true. The ground reality was clouding the faith in her husband's words. That tourist happened to be my wife and it was so painful for me to see that what Cherrapunji had to offer her actually paled in comparison to the wonderful picture of Cherrapunji that I had painted before her while booking the tickets. I know and, those who have witnessed the true breathtaking beauty of Cherrapunji, they know that my words hinge on the glorious past which will soon be forgotten unless the concerned people wake up. We would not have come to this had we valued the tourism potential of this place and had learnt to respect the magnificent gift of God. Our total disregard for the environment has translated into a monster that is slowly but surely taking away our resources. Its high time that we Indians actually ensure that India actually becomes "Incredible India" and towards the fulfillment of that objective, Cherrapunji and the rest of the North East deserve utmost and immediate attention. 

The Seven Sister's Waterfalls (Mawsmai Waterfalls) is one of its kind. Just imagine the curiosity of a tourist when his/her wings of imagination take a flight into that heaven where seven segmented waterfalls cascade down, each striking the surface deep down below with great force but after a little romance with the clouds during the descent. If it is disappointing for the tourist to find that scenery missing, than it is heart-breaking for someone like me who always thought this place will remain the same,i.e. PICTURE PERFECT. The sorry sight of water trickling down like tears down the face of the rocks unfortunately underlined Nature's plight. I agree that we were there at the onset of winters but Cherrapunji had earned its reputation as the wettest place in the world and so the magnificence of Cherrapunji was never dependent on a particular season unlike Shimla, which blooms in winters and then wilts under the Sun in summertime. Climate Change is an issue that we know is being discussed in the corridors of the UN but to witness its destructive impact on our lives is thought provoking to say the least. We must bring back the rains and restore the glory that truly belongs to Cherrapunji.

If manipulations in the environment that are robbing the nature of its beauty are not enough, than the indifferent attitude of the hosts towards the tourists will surely prove to be the death knell for a beautiful place that truly deserves its spot amongst the top tourist destinations. It was baffling to see the expressions of the people who were manning the so-called restaurants near the captivating Mawsmai caves. They were soaking in the Sun outside with hardly any interest in the tourists. The food takes an age to be served and an extra query or an additional demand is met with a look that would make the tourist rethink whether to enter the dark cave alone or not. Thank God we were one intimidating group armed with my villainous looks, Ankur's constipated "Daya" kicks, Arup's "throat-slitting" skills(read clicks),  Gul's viral and Shiladitya's displaced but ever growing muscles.

There is no intention on the part of the Tourism Department of Meghalaya Government to properly manage and monitor these tourist attractions and the facilities for the tourists. Only a blind can ignore such business potential. For instance, the ECO Park was a good addition to the tourism map of Cherrapunji and I must admit that I had great fun on one such trip in the year 2008. So, next time I went there with Ranbir, I asked him to stop by that park. There was no ECO Park there and instead we were chased away by a caretaker for clicking a few pictures. We wondered what was that man taking care of??? Anyways, at least there was one person who was taking his job seriously. That was a KLPD but I managed to play it down and this time I did not even want to pass by that park. I remember doing a presentation on "Business idea generation" as a student at NIFT. My idea was to start an agency business for film shooting location scouting in the North-east. The idea was good and I was serious about that atleast for a couple of days till I was done with the presentation. It seems there are people like me in the Tourism Department as well. I could be excused but even the concerned officials are treating the matter as a classroom assignment which is inconsequential to their marksheet. And that is the irony. How can the people who matter sit on a gold mine and let all of it go to waste????

It had been a long time wish to see the Double Decker Root Bridge but the confusing way (thanks to the missing roadside signs) made the journey so difficult that by the time we could reach there, almost everyone had lost the enthusiasm. The drive downhill on the narrow zigzag roads was so puzzling that we were wondering if at all we would be able to get the car to turn back.  My wish has remained unfulfilled and I hope that I get another chance in this lifetime. In hindsight, I feel that a trip to the Asia's cleanest village (Mawlyngong) instead would have been much more fulfilling. 

The trip would remain a special one because of the four clowns who kept me entertained with their antics all along. Gul was not feeling well but that didn't stop her from joining us as we seized control of the roads. She had only one wish while fighting drowsiness and that was to get clicked with golden grass. Shiladitya was hurt with a hamstring pull (that's his version) but he seemed to be fine the moment Ankur lay his sweaty hands on him for a "Thigh Message".... oops I meant "Thai Message". The driver did help out as well by stroking Adi's hair. As they say, love and romance blooms in the nature so beautiful. Well, I am not talking about me and my wife but the special bond that was visible between Arup and Ankur. Bhagwaan karein ki Fevicol ki mazboot jod ho jo kabhi tootein naa....unki Dosti I mean. And for that matter, our dosti as well.

Gul could not see much of Shillong due to a severe viral attack and I wish to take her back there soon with the hope that glory of Cherrapunji would be restored by then and Asia's cleanest village would continue to remain clean till we say "hi" to the rains there again.

How can Bangladeshis take away rights which even the Indians are deprived of???

When I had mentioned in my last post that I would like to share my thoughts on the recent spate of violence in Assam and talk about the issues that have impacted the lives of many in that state and the North-East at large, I had just one thing in mind and that was just my hatred for the insurgents from the neighbouring country. It is not that suddenly I have started to develop a soft-corner for those people but my perspective has changed for sure. We have to blame ourselves as much for this day as we blame those infiltrators. When you do not respect the existence and freedom of your family members and choose to throw them out of the home, you end up opening the door to the unwanted strangers. Instead of strengthening the family ties, if you break the family then you become vulnerable and invite trouble. In the fight between the two, it is often the third person that ends up benefiting the most. Whether it is in Mumbai or it is in the North-East, it is the genuine citizens who have been forced to leave their homes and who fills those vacant spaces??? Any guesses??????? Well, the answer could well be the insurgents who have illegally made our country their home for bread or for blood.

"We have a home but we are homeless."-that was the feeling most of the non-tribals grew up with in the North-East. In Shillong, non-tribals are still not allowed to freely purchase property. Shillong is my home and I am proud of that place as much as any tribal is. I genuinely feel that there is no place better in India than Shillong but then I do not want to go back and settle there. I dreamt of a good life in Shillong but then I do not want to grow old and die in a rented house. When our parents were born there and we grew up there as well, then why such discrimination??? In Assam, there was a time when Bengali-bashing had become a popular past time. All non-tribals are "Dkhars" and when the young tribal students go out of North-East, they are mockingly referred to as "Chinkis" or "Chinese". This is disgusting and ridicules an Indian's right to live in any part of India and call it his or her home. North-East has seen a huge exodus of talented people and now the state of affairs is such that talented doctors and engineers have been replaced by talented terrorists and fake Indians. Mumbai is also going the same way. Such infiltration become all the more menacing for huge country like ours when those insurgents gel in with the crowd and obtain Identity Cards with the help of power hungry politicians.

Coming to the Bodos versus Muslims clashes which have claimed so many lives and threatened to destroy the peaceful lives of many north-easterners in other parts of the country, I must say this was inevitible. The infiltration of Bangladeshis had gone beyond the tolerance of the local people. There is a huge dearth of job opportunities in that region due to negligible development of trade and industry over the years. The anti-

Centre sentiments had been simmering in the hearts of the local people and now with the Bangladeshi muslims snatching away their land and livelihood, things went beyond control. The insecurities fuelled the aggression and violence erupted when those illegal muslim migrants united in the acts of violence to somehow stop themselves being forced out. It was the duty of the State Government to not only stop Bodos from

adopting the aggressive route by addressing their concerns but also by throwing those illegal migrants out. They failed (if at all they tried I mean) and so the citizens took law into their own hands.

The most shocking aspect, however, was that not a single Muslim Organisation spoke out against the muslim infiltrators. Rather there seemed to be a lot of support for those infiltrators while the local tribe got cornered. It was strange to see the Muslims taking to the streets in major Indian cities against the attacks on the Muslim migrants. It is clear that they put religion before country. I have tremendous respect for the strong bond that the Muslim communities have but what troubles me is that they have not come out to showcase their love for India. Just imagine the day when all the muslims in every Indian city come out on the streets to show to the world that they are the children of mother India and no outsider should dare to even think bad about India and Indians. You cannot expect to enjoy the benefits of being an Indian citizen unless you do not stand up for India. Hindus like us, as usual, chose to be indifferent and again did not come out in support of the Indians and against those cockroaches who are infesting our society. Pakistan, China and Bangladesh would have been delighted to witness the cracks that have been exposed by the chaotic scenes that one witnessed in our railway stations in cities like Bangalore and Hyderabad recently. If a couple of SMSs can cause such chaos then we as citizens must question ourselves and our Government regarding our roles in strengthening the nation. Otherwise, the termites would make our country hollow from within and weakening it enough for any of our neighbours to make merry.

One would have noticed that in the clash between the local tribe and the illegal migrants, it was the genuine non-tribals who also had to run away from cities like Bangalore and Hyderabad for fear of life. Unless we see ourselves as Indians, we would never be able to stop these infiltrators of any caste, community or colour. Tribals or non-tribals; Dkhars or Chinkis; Bengalis, Bodos or Assamese; Hindus or Muslims..... nothing should matter as long as we are Indians. Any home can only be protected against the outside threats, only when all the family members enjoy equal rights to the ownership of every corner of that home. If there is any inner discord between the family members then the outsiders would have to hardly break any sweat to break in and take possession. Finding a fake Indian is like finding a needle in the haystack but it becomes a bit easier if we focus on the needle rather than the varied features or types of hay.

ARE WE INDIANS UPTO THE TASK??????????

North East or North East India....WHAT IS IT????

Seven years away from North East India and I have met enough strangers to say that only a small percent of them were aware about the scenic beauty of that region, a few did talk about the law and order situation there but the biggest chunk was of ignorant fools who carried the brains in their head like a decorative piece without much utility value.Otherwise, how would one explain such ignorance exhibited by the educated folks? Initially, I used to feel insulted and often replied back in anger-"Kya aapke school mein Geography teacher ki kami thi???". But, gradually I started to be indifferent to such puzzled looks. I am proud of my home town. That society is much more forward in terms of education, fashion, music and culture. Infact, the rest of the country would do good to learn a lesson or two about the matrilineal society that exists there. The issues like female foeticide and crimes against woman would get taken care of once woman are given their due respect.

It really irks me when I see news channels going into a frenzy every year about cut-offs in Delhi or the stress levels that CBSE students suffer during admissions. Have they ever cared to highlight the plight of students from North-East who have to take that call of leaving their home states and dive into that competition on their own?? Consider this... a topper from non CBSE board from North-East carries a marksheet that pales in comparison to the inflationary tendencies that is the hallmark of CBSE. Those students from North-East are in no way inferior to their counterparts in the metros and rather better atleast at Geography for sure. The question is not about who is better than whom but the issue here is that the media needs to correct its myopic vision and understand that it has a duty to report news from all corners of the country and there are seven states in that corner for God's sake. It is very difficult for a student in North East to take the most important decision about their careers because the popular centers of professional education are miles and miles away. Trust me, when I say that it is a scary thought to leave behind an idyllic life in a beautiful place like Shillong and then travel to a big chaotic city with little or no clue about where would one find good education, social acceptance, exciting opportunities and good life. Internet of course has made information seeking easier but fifteen minutes of air time would be praise worthy for sure.

How many times have you seen a piece of news regarding the North-East on the front page of the daily newspaper?? Most of you would instantly recollect the ongoing riots in Assam and that is so unfortunate, isn't it?? There are so many beautiful sights in that region, so much of rich history, such wonderful cultures and yet all of these have remained a mystery to lot of people who call themselves Indians and yet their India ends where West Bengal ends. It won't be a surprise if someday we find more ink being dedicated to this region on Chinese dailies than on Indian newspapers. I will talk about the riots and related issues in my next post but this one is about the perceived step-motherly treatment meted out to the seven sisters and the total lack of concern on the part of the Center do something about it.

While I was growing up, I had a feeling that North-East was not being given due importance as mainstream India by the rest of India and the North-Eastern extremist groups loathed the very idea of being considered as Indians. There were lot of issues that led to development of such mutual feeling. As for common men like us, we preferred safety and hence adapted to such sorry state of things. Bandhs and sometimes even curfews would keep us indoors while the rest of India would be celebrating Independence Day or Republic Day. Insurgency led issues and center's apathy over the years had created a phobia amongst the indegenous people against any outsider. As a result, North-East is still not quite the Incredible India and its credibility as a tourism hotspot remains unfortunately questionable to a large extent. The magnificence of the Seven Sisters has remained confined to the Maps or in the words of those who have lived or happened to visit the region. Tourism and only tourism has the power to appreciate and popularise the jewel that we call the North East.

One good thing about Western Culture is that young people are encouraged to travel. So what if they don't learn from the books, they learn it through experience. In India, travel according to the youth is packing bags and heading to some Engineering Institute or some MBA Institute while for the elderly, it is bowing before God in Rishikesh or Mecca. Telegus are doing rounds of Visa Balaji, Punjabis are more at home in CaNNNada, Biharis travelling to any place where there is either a vacancy or a competitive exam on and Keralites love the dry conditions of the Gulf. There are only two communities who you can find on any tourist destination and those are Bengalis and Gujratis. But the inherent problem with Bengalis is the over-protective nature of the parents whose "Shona Go" and "Baba Go" attitude drains out the adventurous spirit of the kids. Gujratis, on the other hand, prefer to travel in big groups and enjoy being busy with themselves. As for our generation, we appreciate nature only when we are looking through the lens and there is Facebook page waiting for the pictures. 

Guys do take a few days off and enjoy the sights and sounds of the seven beautiful sisters. I close this post by praying that the eastern corner in the golden quadrilateral is given as much importance as any other part of India. It is about time that India gets stronger at strategic geographic points. Now, quickly tell me the names of seven north-eastern States and their capitals???? Now, would you call yourself an INDIAN??????

MORE THAN GOD.....BUT UNDERRATED...!!!

Let me start by admitting that this post has been inspired by a few lines that my dearest(..and only) wife, Gul penned for her lovely mother.

The days when I slept in your lap,
and you never moved away.
The days when troubles surrounded me,
and you came in the way.
Cooked for me after tiring routine,
the days when I said;
“Oh Mom….what bad cuisine!!!”
Know its late realising all this,
But hard when I so much miss,
a pat for all the rights and a scolding for all the wrongs.
Though leading a wonderful life,
But its impossible forgetting the time.
The day when I left home for another sky,
And you had tears in your eye.

I have told her on quite a few occasions that she is good at poetry. I have been trying to convince her to keep those poems stored somewhere for us to enjoy later in life. But she doesn’t listen. Anyways, she has aptly brought out the importance of the word “Mother” in our lives.

I know it is difficult for her being away from the person who gave birth to her and then brought her up so well. Moreover, she also longs for the presence of my mother who would have guided her at this early stage of her married life. It becomes all the more important because ours is an altogether different culture and she needs some elder to adapt quickly. She is a fast learner and learning well under my expert eyes…hehehe. I just booked my parents’ tickets and so the Kitchen team is going to get stronger soon. But such is life. A woman develops the traits of a wonderful mother when she moves away from her mother. What an irony?????

But I feel there is logic here because this is the stage when a woman realises the importance of a mother’s presence in a child’s life. That is when she imbibes all the values that go on to make her a good mother later on. She becomes much more responsible and gradually gets comfortable at the art of juggling. The transition into an “Inhouse Management Guru” is a tough one. The art of motivation, leadership, delegation of authority and planning etc. are perfected by a woman only when she gets her hands dirty in the daily rigours of life.

It is said that a daughter is closest to her father and a son to his mother. I love my mother a lot but my father has been my buddy and yet I can share with her what I can’t with my father. It is so assuring to be around her. I left Shillong in 2005 and while leaving that beautiful place, I could see her eyes struggling to hold back tears. I didn’t give her a hug then to console her as I do not like to be seen as emotional. In these seven years, I have not spent much time with her. But now I do miss her a lot. Especially after marriage it seems that I am missing her much more. Perhaps, this is happening because now I have settled down and distractions are less. I come back home and see a daughter missing her mother. I get into the kitchen along with my wife to experiment and we miss the guidance of an expert hand. I think about her age or I find out that she is not keeping well and then I am flooded with all the bad thoughts.

We take our mothers for granted but the fact that she means the world to us remains clouded till we are deprived of her very presence. When she used to try and help us, we wanted to be independent and now when we have the freedom to act at will, we miss her interventions at every stage. I have grown up, I am earning fine, I am married and I know how to look after myself but in essence, I am still that innocent kid who is eagerly waiting to be pampered. Every kid is a good kid around his or her mother. That is her power. The love and affection somehow magically rubs off on us and gets the childlike innocent side of us to come out in its full glory. She is equal to God because she remains in our subconscious mind and we children selfishly remember her when we are nervous or afraid or hopeful or in trouble. God may or may not come but a mother surely is always around as long as she lives. That way, she is on a higher pedestal than the almighty as well.

Guys, just go back a few sentences(oh plz…cmon you have anyways come this far)and you will find that there is only selfishness when I tell you that I need my mother to be around. You go and ask her why would she like to be with her son and she would say, “because my son needs me!!!”.

Saluting all MAAs and Mummas again…….

When the dream turns into a nightmare.......!!!

Besides Roti and Kapda, Makaan is the basic requirement for a good life. But more importantly, “Khud ka makaan” is a wish that every man harnesses. This wish often transforms a common man’s life into a mission, a mission to earn and save enough to own a house that he can really call it his own. Four walls and a roof that one can call one’s own is much more valuable than even a rented posh apartment. Every common man diligently works towards that aim and kabhi kabhi ussi mein puri zindagi nikal jaati hain…..!!! To every man, his home is his castle and to see the transformation of the hard earned money into an abode full of love and happy memories is perhaps the most fulfilling experience for any one. In India, people make homes for their posterity or at least, this has been the tradition. So often, you would see that a man buys or builds a house just before he is about to retire. Things have changed with easy availability of housing finance and changing mindset but the urge to provide protection to the next generation cuts across the barriers of wealth and status.

As a banker, I have met many borrowers, both present and prospective. But I was really sad to see the plight of one such man whose smile has vanished somewhere after his prized possession became a cause of pain and anxiety for him. Sitting on the other side of the table, I could feel the hurt, anger and frustration simmering within him. If I were to put words to the story of this man’s journey as a borrower, probably this is how I would write it down.

A man in his early fifties walked in once with the hope that his dream of owning a house would get realised soon. He went through all the processes as fast as he could as he was eager to gift his wife and three kids a new home. He felt proud every time he looked in his wife’s eyes which reflected the promises of a future full of loving memories. One glance at his kids and the doting father felt that they should get an easier and much happier life. He got blinded by the rosy picture of future and that is where he made the first mistake. Like all borrowers, even he signed the dotted lines without reading the document. His income was not that great but his retirement benefits would have been able to cover his debt. Further, the wise Banker convinced him to go for an insurance to cover the home loan. The idea behind such insurance is that should anything happen to the borrower, the debt burden would be taken care of by the insurance for a meagre premium per month. This saves the rest of the family from the hassles of Bank’s recovery efforts. In this case, the man had to just pay Rs.250 per month which seemed affordable then. The man got the loan and soon he ushered in a new future at a place close to his heart.

But gradually things started going wrong once he retired. He used up the retirement benefits to set up a small business for his son instead of paying off his debt as he thought that his three kids would take care of their father’s burden. Life had other ideas though and his world soon came crushing down. He lost his dear wife and his kids grew up to be useless, selfish and callous. They added further weight to the heavy burden the poor man was already struggling to carry. The home no longer comforted him and neither did it give him any peace of mind. For a few grains of rice, he had to hear hundreds of abuses everyday from his sons and daughter in laws. The cacophony outside started sounding sweeter than the voices he heard within the four walls. He could fight with the world but not with his own children and in his own home that he shaped with lot of sweat and blood. Now, it is just a structure witnessing his miserable life moving on. It is more like a Grave and not a Home any longer. He is still breathing but he is not living life. The father can never be harsh on the kids and so his heart melts every time he sees the innocent faces of his grandchildren. He knows that his kids would struggle for survival after he is no more. Four walls and a roof would be a great asset to possess in those hard times.

When things start going wrong, they seem so unrelenting. The Bank called to inform that the revised interest rates would mean that the poor man has to shell out more every month. When a man is cornered, he becomes rebellious. He fights back. His fight does not imply that he is right but it is just an outburst of all that he has patiently withstood since misfortune started courting his life. He blamed the Bank for increasing interest rates contrary to the agreement terms and conditions. He is ignorant of the way bank finance works as had not read the fine print that day when he was in a hurry to take the loan. He is sinking deep into depression and so he is trying to hang on to the last straw wherever he could find one. He rebelled against the advise given by the bank and continues to pay less than what is required. The loan has reached a stage where it could go bad any moment and so the bank has to step up the recovery efforts. Banking is a process but Bankers are humans after all, and so we counselled him on multiple occasions. During one such session, the old man broke down and introduced us to his sorry state of affairs. 

This 64 year old man is working as a security guard in an ATM while sons are sitting shamelessly idle at home turning a blind eye to the pain of their father. At an age when he was supposed to enjoy his time at home with his grand children, the poor man is instead putting his life at stake by guarding a 10’x10’ space for twelve hours in the scorching heat. This 10'x10' space could end up as his grave soon. He is so frail that he won’t be able to even put up a minute of resistance should there be any theft. For a few, life is a story of never ending struggle and he is one of those fighters. But somewhere age has caught up with him and he is losing this hopeless battle. He is working hard at this age not because he has any expectations from life but the honest man is toiling hard for peanuts just to die without any debt. This is precisely the thought that dominates the mind of all self respecting senior citizens in our society. When we heard his unfortunate story, we were really shaken. Our first thought was to calm him down as at this age his heart has become too vulnerable to withstand such traumatic existence and his mind is too weak to shun thoughts of suicide. We consoled him and spoke to his sons to help him out and take up their responsibility. But, the arrogant losers dismissed our advise and simply told us that it is not their responsibility to pay off the debt as they had not taken the loan. We felt pity for such asses who do not know the value of a father in life. At that point, I felt like kicking them out but then I stopped myself thinking that sooner or later, these cowards will be taught a lesson in life.

The irony of life is that the father cannot sell his property as his kids would end up on the road, the loan can be taken care of by the insurance but for that the old man has to be dead. As for now, the insurance premium of Rs.250 itself is proving to be a great burden for the man. The system is automated and it does not consider the emotions or the pains of a human being. It only knows that a certain sum should be paid before a certain date. I splurge all my savings and here is a man who is struggling to earn Rs.250. Helping him personally by lending him some money once or twice is fine but this is not a permanent solution as there is no light at the end of the tunnel here. Sooner or later, the bank will realise the debt by auctioning off the property and we are just delaying the inevitable in the hope that at least one son will stand up like a man and make his life count. We are also trying to find ways to reduce the burden by exercising various options within the banking norms. There are rich borrowers who default at the pretext of not having enough time to deposit the repayment and then there are those like this man who put their integrity above everything else. He reminds me of my father who has also done everything possible to give me a good life and if I do not take care of him now then there is no meaning to my existence. I pray to God that he does some magic so that this borrower of mine can live his last few years happily and free of any burden. To conclude, I would like to advise all of you to pay off your debts well on time instead of sticking to the regular EMIs. Life is full of surprises and so every extra cent saved should be used to clear off the debt.